The Elephant in the Brain

The Elephant in the Brain by Kevin Simler and Robin Hanson takes an interesting look at why we really do the things we do. They unpack the hidden motives in everyday life and make you question them. I found this book interesting and the way it’s written makes it very easy to digest. They begin by explaining why we hide our real motives and give examples of this behaviour historically and in primates. They then discuss topics like body language, conversation, consumption, art, education, religion and more. They question our motives in each topic and make you realise that we do a lot of things on autopilot. If this book helps with anything, it makes you think a bit deeper and more critically about your actions.

The main idea is that people are judging and being judged all the time. One of the main things that people are trying to figure out about each other are what our motives are- will we make for a good friend, ally, or lover? We recognize that people are doing this, so we emphasize our positive motives and downplay our ugly ones. We aren’t completely honest with each other, but more importantly, we aren’t honest with ourselves. Robert Trivers says “We deceive ourselves the better to deceive others.” We are constantly lying to ourselves so that we don’t feel like we’re lying to others.

Humans are competitive and we play three games that can overlap with one another. They are politics, sex, and social status- and winning prizes in these three games is what motivates most of our decisions. Some may deny that winning at these things motivates them, but when we look at the evolution of humankind, we can see that these three games were and still are everything to us. Politically we’re on the lookout for potential alliances and teammates: mutually beneficial relationships that could help us succeed in many ways. Sexually we’re looking for the best possible mate, so we do many things to appear attractive and intelligent to come across as a good life partner. Most university graduates marry other graduates and this signalling runs deeper than we may think. Social status is the game that is very prominent in this social media age. Many may deny that they are influenced by it and that people’s opinions of them don’t affect them, but this isn’t true. Social media and people’s perceptions of us dictate many of our decisions and motivations. In all these games, we convince ourselves of certain “positive”, i.e. socially acceptable, reasons for our actions, which allows us to feel good about sharing those reasons with others. Simler and Hanson go into detail about why we may deceive ourselves and compare the old vs new schools of thought on self-deception.

Consumption

The constant theme of competitive signalling is evident in our consumption. Many of our purchases are not out of need, but rather motivated by some sort of signalling. This is all relative and one’s “luxurious lifestyle” will differ from the next person. The authors believe that there’s a lot more than wealth and class that we’re trying to show off with our purchases. Many purchases are made to signal environmental care, even if goods are less luxurious. Experiments showed that when our purchases are made publicly (cars or going to a mall) we tend to be more eco-friendly, but if we’re shopping online or if people don’t know what we’ve bought, we don’t seem to care as much.   

In a thought experiment, they explain that aliens have come to earth and rendered us oblivious to each other’s possessions. Everything else about our psychology remains the same and we’re still able to enjoy our possessions. What would happen to our purchasing decisions? Our interest in brand names and logos will diminish and anything in the “showing off” category won’t have much use. This doesn’t mean that we won’t appreciate expensive, good quality clothing made from comfortable fabrics, but who it’s made by won’t matter. This would mean product variety would begin to dry up. This thought experiment makes me think twice about making purchases and consider what my motives really are.

They go on to discuss advertising and how its goal is not to influence us directly but to create a third-person effect. We think we’re too smart to be duped by these adverts, but we think other people may fall for them. So, we buy the product anyway because we feel other people may consider it to be a good product. I find this interesting and feel like this is the way most people fall victim to advertising campaigns.

Charity

Charity is an interesting topic because public signalling is a necessity to get people to give money to causes. We’re even given a sticker when we donate blood, just to show everyone else that we care. Experiments have found that we tend to give more when we can show that we have donated. That’s why charities commemorate their donors with plaques and public announcements. We’re also more likely to donate because of peer pressure- if everyone is donating money to your church, you will too. It was also found that door-to-door donations raised more money when two people asked for donations together compared to someone asking on their own.

They created a non-exclusive list of reasons that influence our charitable behaviour:

1.      Visibility – We give more when we’re being watched.

2.      Peer Pressure – Our giving responds strongly to social influences.

3.      Proximity – We prefer to help people locally rather than globally.

4.      Relatability – We give more when the people we help are identifiable (via faces and/or stories) and give less in response to numbers and facts.

5.      Mating Motive - We’re more generous when primed with a mating motive.

They go into detail on each point and make you realise that the best way to donate is to save the most lives, but this doesn’t tick all of the above boxes. Effective Altruism website GiveWell researches the charities that make the biggest impact per dollar. If you’re able to see past these influences and want to make the biggest difference possible, then check them out.  

I’ve barely scratched the surface of this rather dense book, but it has so much great information and insights into the way we think. I’ll use it as a reminder to keep myself in check and make sure I’m not falling victim to some of these easy-to-make mistakes. Simler and Hanson have an extensive list of all their research that can take you down an endless path of discovery.